I love how we’re all done shrinking, the older we get, the more freeing we become. I’m also here for it. I’m also done with the making myself less so others can be more comfortable. Bravo 👏🏼 another homerun.
I’m 47, Aphrodite body type (means curvy and not skinny), and I love wearing fitting stretchy colorful dresses or skirts, I’m not hiding my curves any more. 💃🏼💃🏼
"I'm not hiding my body. More than that - I'm not hiding. Full stop." I read that twice. The first time as a statement. The second time as a woman drawing a line in the sand and daring the whole room to look.
The hat is the tell. You didn't pick a subtle accessory to ease into visibility. You picked the thing that absolutely draws attention and wore it like you were done apologizing for having a head. That's not confidence. That's a woman who spent years making herself smaller and then one day realized the effort of shrinking was harder than the risk of being seen.
The meeting room shift is where this gets real. Going from behind-the-scenes to speaking directly - that's not a career move. That's a woman who discovered that clarity isn't aggressive. It's just what happens when you stop translating yourself into something more digestible for everyone else.
I don't know who told you to be less noticeable. But I know this: the hat suits you.
Thank you so much for your kind words! 'The effort of shrinking was harder than the risk of being seen' is exactly it. And I might just have to wear that hat every day now ;)
Amen girl! Also at that point where I give no fs. But I live in my leggings and love a comfy oversized sweatshirt. I have never been a gal of style - ask my hubby 😂 I’m more for comfort. If we do go out, I do dress nice and rock it. It’s no one else’s business what any woman is wearing and it’s nice that in midlife we start realizing that and just celebrating not shrinking. Thank you for this!
LOVE this! Yes, I have been looking for more booby shirts. It's actually been extremely hard to find something outside of fast fashion that's super sexy. If you have any recommendations, I'm all ears!
There is something so electric about that moment you realize "flattering" is often just a polite way of asking you to disappear, and you decide to buy the loud hat instead. Love this ✨
Yes! I refuse to fade into the background. And if some people know me as the weird lady with all the hats, so be it! At least I'm having fun and I'm memorable!
Yes! Love this. Bigger clothes only make ME look bigger. I'm learning to celebrate my curves even though they've gotten more curvier in the last few years. Yes, to taking up space in all aspects of life. As your Substack name says, it's time to give zero Fs about all of it!
It's absolutely the time to give zero F's! Some people like baggy, bigger clothes (and power to them!) but they just aren't for me. And I'm right there with you on celebrating curves, even if they are getting curvier. Mine definitely are! ;)
I would love it if you did a post on makeup. I feel like ladies in their 40s are underserved in this area. I've never been a huge makeup person, but I'd like an easy way to feel made up when I go out without either looking like a teenager or feeling like a movie star with pounds of makeup on after having a bad makeup artist assigned to me.
I love how we’re all done shrinking, the older we get, the more freeing we become. I’m also here for it. I’m also done with the making myself less so others can be more comfortable. Bravo 👏🏼 another homerun.
Thanks Nat! I love it. I'm all about taking up space these days. Including wearing my big ass hats that take up too much space in pictures :)
I’m 47, Aphrodite body type (means curvy and not skinny), and I love wearing fitting stretchy colorful dresses or skirts, I’m not hiding my curves any more. 💃🏼💃🏼
And I pole dance. Definitely not hiding. 🔥🔥
Thanks Csilla! I think this is why we get along so well! ;)
Yes one of the reasons. The other might be that joy is important for both of us, and not victimhood.
You are beautiful and you wear life well. You are worthy of respect!
Kewl❣️
"I'm not hiding my body. More than that - I'm not hiding. Full stop." I read that twice. The first time as a statement. The second time as a woman drawing a line in the sand and daring the whole room to look.
The hat is the tell. You didn't pick a subtle accessory to ease into visibility. You picked the thing that absolutely draws attention and wore it like you were done apologizing for having a head. That's not confidence. That's a woman who spent years making herself smaller and then one day realized the effort of shrinking was harder than the risk of being seen.
The meeting room shift is where this gets real. Going from behind-the-scenes to speaking directly - that's not a career move. That's a woman who discovered that clarity isn't aggressive. It's just what happens when you stop translating yourself into something more digestible for everyone else.
I don't know who told you to be less noticeable. But I know this: the hat suits you.
Thank you so much for your kind words! 'The effort of shrinking was harder than the risk of being seen' is exactly it. And I might just have to wear that hat every day now ;)
Amen girl! Also at that point where I give no fs. But I live in my leggings and love a comfy oversized sweatshirt. I have never been a gal of style - ask my hubby 😂 I’m more for comfort. If we do go out, I do dress nice and rock it. It’s no one else’s business what any woman is wearing and it’s nice that in midlife we start realizing that and just celebrating not shrinking. Thank you for this!
Thanks so much for reading! You should rock whatever makes you feel good!
LOVE this! Yes, I have been looking for more booby shirts. It's actually been extremely hard to find something outside of fast fashion that's super sexy. If you have any recommendations, I'm all ears!
I'm obsessed with the Honeylove tanks with built in bras. Super cleavage-y but still supportive. I have a few of them!
oo! worth checking out!
I love this. I feel like I am finally getting comfortable with this midlife body. 🩷I also love sweatpants.🤷🏻♀️🤪
You are absolutely allowed to love sweatpants! :)
There is something so electric about that moment you realize "flattering" is often just a polite way of asking you to disappear, and you decide to buy the loud hat instead. Love this ✨
Yes! I refuse to fade into the background. And if some people know me as the weird lady with all the hats, so be it! At least I'm having fun and I'm memorable!
Keep leaning into that joy, because the world is much better when it's full of people who aren't afraid to be memorable ✨
Yes! Love this. Bigger clothes only make ME look bigger. I'm learning to celebrate my curves even though they've gotten more curvier in the last few years. Yes, to taking up space in all aspects of life. As your Substack name says, it's time to give zero Fs about all of it!
It's absolutely the time to give zero F's! Some people like baggy, bigger clothes (and power to them!) but they just aren't for me. And I'm right there with you on celebrating curves, even if they are getting curvier. Mine definitely are! ;)
I would love it if you did a post on makeup. I feel like ladies in their 40s are underserved in this area. I've never been a huge makeup person, but I'd like an easy way to feel made up when I go out without either looking like a teenager or feeling like a movie star with pounds of makeup on after having a bad makeup artist assigned to me.
It's funny you say that because I do have on my list for future essays my complicated relationship with makeup! Maybe I will move it up in the queue!