18 Comments
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Jody Delichte|Choosing Herself's avatar

It really is about taking ownership. Saying 'no, I don't want to or don't feel like it' can be hard. But it's something I learned how to do on my journey of choosing myself. I still don't always get it right and give myself a kick after the fact. But I'm getting better at it. :-)

Brandi Lynn's avatar

It’s so convicting to realize that "busy" is often just a shield we use to keep from admitting what we actually value. There’s such a shift in power when you stop acting like your schedule is a storm happening to you and start admitting that you’re the one who built the clouds. It makes the "yes" moments, like the Easter Egg Roll, feel less like a stressor and more like a conscious gift you're giving yourself. Love this ✨

Amanda | 40 & Giving Zero F’s's avatar

Thanks for reading! At the end of the day, we're all more in control of our schedule than we think. I love the way you framed it: "Stop acting like your schedule is a storm happening to you and start admitting that you're the one who built the clouds." So good!

Brandi Lynn's avatar

I love reading honesty ✨

Mandy Maples's avatar

I really like this. A few years back my counselor reality checked me into are you too busy or are you just tired of doing everything? So, we reframed our house to just be honest and own it. Instead of we are busy this weekend we say we just want some down time or whatever the gods honest truth is. Some folks get their feelers hurt and others appreciate the directness. Either way when I hear I’m busy now I think man when are you going to let yourself off the hook. Great job writing this and hitting the nail on the head!

Amanda | 40 & Giving Zero F’s's avatar

Thanks! I would rather be honest and risk hurting feelings than lie to people. And giving space for everyone to make their own choices and own their priorities. Thanks for reading!

Erika Glover's avatar

Love the whole perspective shift of “choosing” versus it being “chosen for me”. We are all in control over how we book ourselves out to some extent. It’s hard when you have kiddos and they have activities. But you can always say no. I’ve learned saying no and choosing how I want to fill my life makes my body feel so much lighter.

Amanda | 40 & Giving Zero F’s's avatar

The kid factor is definitely tough. My daughters are young but they are already overscheduled. But it's a good opportunity to lean into talking about tradeoffs early with them! And sometimes we just say no.

Emmie's avatar

Girl, same. This is a good reminder to be more honest about it.

You Are The Oracle's avatar

It really is a whole mind reframe to not pack our calendars and our lives so full!!

Jenn Larson's avatar

Really like this perspective shift to - I’m choosing it. Busy vs full is a hard balance for me as well!

Valerie Beliard's avatar

I am busy. Trying not to lose my mind. 😅

Kathleen | The Reading Rebel's avatar

Love this! When I use I'm busy as an excuse, and I know I'm lying, I can feel it in my body. It's easier and less exhausting to just tell the truth. I'd rather not do that thing. Or next week, Kathleen will probably not want to do that even though it sounds fun today. You are so right, we are more in control of our time than we think. Like going to book club! Yay! Read more books!

Amanda | 40 & Giving Zero F’s's avatar

Yes! I could write a whole other piece on "stop saying yes to things tomorrow that you wouldn't do today!" if today you doesn't want to do it, there's a good chance future you won't either! And who are we kidding, I'm always prioritizing reading! :)

Caroline Shattan's avatar

I am learning that I love packing my life full to the brim and doing all the activities that bring me joy…we are never too busy to make time for the things that matter 😘

Amanda | 40 & Giving Zero F’s's avatar

Like going to learn to make sourdough at a brewery tonight? ;)

Caroline Shattan's avatar

Absolutely 😉

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